My house was a bit of a revolving door today.
The kids didn't have school so I stayed home from work. We had therapy scheduled from 8:30 - 5 and I debated how much to cancel so that we could go somewhere and enjoy the beautiful weather.
I started in on the day. Writing up lists for the kids, cleaning the house, getting things in gear. At 8:30 the therapists showed up (3 of them) and by 10 we had dug up the backyard looking for worms for our wormery and had built a 4 × 8 cardboard city complete with airport that had jetways for little people.
At 10:30, a friend of Phillips came over for a playdate and around 1 my sister in law showed up with two cousins.... who needs to go anywhere? My house transformed into a mini preschool and the kids played hard... for hours.
I hardly spoke to my sister in law. The two of us soaked in sunlight engaging different groups of kids as they naturally rotated playmates.
For the most part, they all played nicely. A few easy to break up squabbles. But it was way easier then it should have been with 7 kids, 5 of whom were under five.
Everyone left around 5 and I threw together a quick dinner and we took a stroll downtown before heading into the bedtime routine.
As I reflect on the day, I think about my sister in law. And I think.. love is slow.
She and I are two very different people who married a pair of brothers. We share a deep commitment to family. We show up. To my mother in laws house nearly every weekend, to each other's events, birthdays, holidays, vacations. We let each other discipline each other's kids. We stand together when if deep down we don't fully agree with each other.
Today, I felt the comfortableness that comes from years of showing up and keeping at it. We had a perfect, ordinary day with seven small children running around and banging into our legs. We read stories. Played in the sand. Raced cars and looked at bugs. We got a few words into each other here and there but mostly we silently shared space in the most intimate, motherly way. Completely at home with each other and ourselves. Relaxed. Blessed.
Love is a commitment that you work at. Not just with your spouse, but with your parents, your siblings, your inlaws.... sometimes it's not easy. Marriage is clearly not easy, but family isn't always easy either. But it's a blessing. As we keep chipping away at it... showing up, saving space, forgiving, extending grace, we can make it work.
And sometimes, after an ordinary Friday afternoon it dawns on me what an extraordinary blessing it is.
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