Thursday, March 21, 2019

Day 16: change can be real hard

Miles has been having a hard time sleeping and we think it's time to toss the bottle.

Our kids are incredibly sensory seeking, so the thought of removing a soothing sensory stimulation is done very lightly.
Andrew didn't give up his bottle till he was five. 

Last night was the first night of trying to go to bed without a bottle. Took about 45 minutes to put him to sleep (cause he was completely exhausted) but he was up at 2am for a bottle and cried until around 4.

He doesn't know how to sleep without the sensation of sucking. Or at least he doesnt think he can.

I rock him.
Sing.
Rub his back.

Soothe him through the fury of the tantrum.

My heart aches.

I think about my post from yesterday.  Letting go of habits is easier when not embedded in a routine.  But here we are at a core routine.  Falling asleep at night.  Change is a battle ground.

Behind the resistance is a fear that we can't. 

A fear that we can't possibly fall asleep without a bottle.

But maybe we can. 

Maybe if I let go and trust the hand that pushes me out of my comfort zone. The hand that comforts and reassures me. Maybe I can set fear aside and trust that I can fall asleep without my bottle

In the meantime, I'll be up with a very unhappy two year old pondering lifes great mysteries greatly anticipating the day that caffiene is an option.

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