Monday, March 14, 2022

Day 14: hormones suck

I had so many feelings today - sadness, irritation, frustration, despair- bubbling below the surface as I went about my day.  I tried to pay attention.  

"What's going on?" I ask myself as I clean the kitchen.  

It wasn't until I sat down to write this blog in the quiet that I begin to wonder if the culprit may be hormones. Damn biology.   God and I will have a conversation about this one day. 

It reminds me that I am a creature bound by my biology.  There are so many practices that can help me elevate my mind and develop inner calm. I can rely on God for my future and trust God with my present. Sometimes faith has an emotional component.  Sometimes,  faith is a commitment to set emotions aside. 

The spirit connected to the heart,  the heart connected to the mind and the mind connected to the body and the body limited by biology. 

I think of Jesus.  Limitless.  Timeless.  Infinite.  Choosing limits as a baby with all the messy complication that comes with being a biological being - including hormones and emotions and a cracking adolescent voice. 

God folded up and limited by the all the same things that limit us. 

I can't even begin to get my head around this but it helps me to accept these human moments with a bit more self- compassion, grace and even detached cognition.  I am not what I feel in this moment. I can choose to give myself space and know that tomorrow I will not feel this way.

I can do that,  but I'm still going to have a chat with God about some of the design choices. 🧐



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