Day 36: Pain sucks

I was driving the kids around today and they were watching the movie Wall-E.

It got me thinking about how the humans were served everything they could ever want. They rode around in hover chairs and were served food and drink on demand while they watched non-stop entertainment.

I used to hate running.  It was so much effort.  I could barely breathe and threw up most times I ran more than a few blocks.  But over time,  I ran further and further distances. 5k, 10k, 10 miles. It was painful at first,  but it grew into an addiction.

I thought about spending life in a hover chair with unlimited room service.  It felt very appealing for an afternoon.  But then,  my body would grow weary and unhealthy.

We need work. 
We need bits of pain.

I wondered if this physical need for pain or work or effort had a parallel for emotional,  spiritual,  social and mental growth.

Yep. 
It does.

Pain sucks.
I want to avoid it when I can.
But pain often grows me.
Makes me stronger
Makes me healthier.
Make me whole.

Of course too much pain breaks me.

Or does it?

In the darkest,  most painful times of my life,  faith was a shadow ever with me.

Childbirth
Being alone in Haiti
Loneliness as a teenager
When people I"ve loved have passed away
Breakups

Hurting body or heart or spirit, created in me a desperation, an openness to let God work.  The situation was too big.  Beyond my control.  There was nothing i could do and so, in my agony,  I trusted.

Sometimes God was slow to act and I grew angry. Feeling abandoned at the hardest times.

But as I reflect now over my life,  I see that pain as a catalyst for God to work in my life and shape and change me and not circumstances.

... but for the record
Pain still sucks.