Lent Day 16: Grumpy

Today started out great. I was positive. I was dealing with change and unexpecteds. I was getting my work done. Then...I picked up Eddie. He is still recovering from a bout of stomach virus and is generally "off." All day he was clingy, hungry, tired. Wouldn't sleep. Wouldn't eat. Pushed my buttons. Ulrich came home to me, a pile on the couch. Defeated. I was cranky too at this point even though I had made amazing plans for BBQing tri-tip for dinner.

At 6:30, I was done. I stripped Eddie and threw him in the tub. It was late enough to start bedtime. Something magic happened. He got happy. He played independently in the tub. He didn't fight me getting out. He let me put his lotion and jammies and happily read his nightly book. When I turned out the light, he sang the lullaby with me and cuddled into me settling himself down to sleep. My heart melted. All this time I have sung to him. He knows the words of the song and sang it back to me.

I reflect on us as God's children. God carries us through our days like a mother of a toddler. He knows the bigger picture of our lives. The past and the future that are beyond our knowledge. He knows what we need. Like toddlers, we resist. We ask for substitutes. We throw tantrums. We try to assert our independence. And sometimes, God lets us try to figure it out, even though it makes both of us miserable. And sometimes, enough is enough and he gives us what we need. Sometimes, magic happens and we find the peace to let God lead us. And sometimes, in the dark stillness, we sing with God the words he's written on our hearts since before we were born. And that must make him smile.