Jesus says we should forgive our brother seven times seventy times. Basically infinitely.
But how many times do we have to patiently answer the phone to have the same conversation with the same person?
It's halfway between dealing with a teenager and an aging relative with dementia. Years of alcohol abuse have taken a toll on her memory and when she has something important or unusual going on she calls me about it.
After 7 calls, my hands deep in soil while I patiently try to help Zander plant the garden, I tell her my patience is wearing thin. I told her this was the last call I'd take from her today and then, she called from another number while I was in the middle of putting kids to bed.
It's ironic really that she should choose today to keep calling over and over. Maybe God has something to teach me.
I had my spiritual direction call in the morning. I had talked about a lot of topics but one of them was how faith compels us to care for those in need. We think about the wide world out there. All the people out there that we don't know who are suffering. It is very difficult to find them and help them.
But we can start with the ones we are given.
By ones I am given, I don't mean my kids or my family. I mean, I kind of do. But that not exclusively who I mean. There are "God moments" every day where our lives cross with a stranger in a meaningful way and sometimes we become given to each other.
My friend with her endless calling was given to me. To change and transform me. To teach and open my eyes. To challenge my faith.... days just like today... how many times do I answer the phone before I draw the line and attend to other matters? She pushes me to wrestle with God. And she sees me in ways others can't or don't. She knows my heart and speaks to me with a tenderness that is a gift. She challenges me to live my faith in a 1,000 different difficult way and that has transformed me as much as anything else.
The world is hurting and so my prayer is, are there others to whom I am called to serve? The random Haitian kid that messaged me out of the blue because he remembered me visiting his orphanage when he was 5? A teenager from my church? The cashier at the grocery store that I visit every day?
And what if I JUST prayed for them.
I have been wrestling with God on the subject of intercessory prayer. How do i know what to pray for? When do we pray for miracles? What if God doesn't show up to answer those prayers? I've gone round and round with God over the past few months. And at the same time, I've had it on my heart to pray deeply and regularly for people that I don't know that well but who are going through some things.
I've come to the same answer. Some people are given to us to pray for and some prayers are given to us to pray. Sometimes I understand it. Sometimes I don't.
Honestly, for me, doing something is easier than prayer. Prayer requires vulnerability and trust. Prayer requires faith, hope and love. Prayer is the advanced course of caring for the world. And prayer has made a difference in big and small ways. Prayer unleashes miracles and catalyzes social movements. And so this Lent, I've added a practice of listening for a call to pray deeply for people and situations. And so far i have found that prayer, like service, is most natural for the "ones I've been given. "
How much of the great need of the world could we lift up if we opened our ears to hear the ones to whom we are given.
Could I be the good neighbor and stop for someone who has fallen on my path, even if it makes me late? Could I have courage to break the ice and go deeper with someone who needs it? Do I have the stomach to open a can of worms when I know it will make my life more complicated? Do I have the courage to be vulnerable in my faith and pray with boldness and belief when my mind struggles with dissonance?
With the growth of violence and reversal in poverty trends, it is easy to see the news and feel so small. This small step of opening my eyes to those who cross my path is a way of engaging the dark world and holding my small light up. If we all did this, the light would be blinding, overwhelming.
May the light blaze. And me we each have eyes to see those who need it.
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